The First Night
by Alryssa
Summary: PG rewritten version of 'First Night'. Bob and Dot's fledgling relationship falters in the face of a startling revelation...


Set just after the final episode of Season 3 ReBoot.  
PG version.  
  
  
The First Night  
  
  
Bob leaned on the balcony railing outside the Principal Office, watching the subdued night-time activity of Mainframe below. The party inside was still going on, as it had since the restart. He'd used the cheering chaos as an excuse to get away for a bit. Just to be alone, outside and see what they'd been fighting for all this time, restored to its former glory. He closed his eyes for a moment, felt the gentle breeze on his skin. He'd missed that, in the Web. There were a lot of things he'd missed. Things that he'd feared he might never see again.   
  
"Bob? Are you OK?"  
  
The Guardian turned, then smiled.   
  
"Hey."   
  
Dot approached him, returning his smile, and slipped her hand into his.   
  
"You left the party. I got worried."  
  
He shook his head, slowly.   
  
"I'm fine. I... just needed to be someplace quiet for a nano, that's all."  
  
Dot rested her head on his shoulder as she took in the view.   
  
"It's pretty out here," she said.   
  
"Not as pretty as you," he countered. She lightly smacked him on the arm, blushing.   
  
"Stop that."  
  
He grinned, and kissed the top of her head as he pulled her to him in a hug. They stayed that way for a few nanos, savouring their closeness.   
  
"I thought you said you hated being alone, especially after... you know," Dot said.   
  
Bob sighed. "I do... but you get used to it, after a bit... and then you start to need it, just once in a while."  
  
Dot nodded, and pulled back to meet his earnest gaze, losing herself for a moment in his sad brown eyes. He wouldn't tell her what had happened in the Web; had only given her vague fragments of information that didn't even begin to hint at his change in demeanour. She almost missed his bravado, his total self-confidence.   
  
"You've changed so much, Bob. You never used to be like this."  
  
Pain flickered momentarily behind his eyes.   
  
"We've all changed, Dot. We had to."  
  
She shook her head. "Not as much as you. It's almost like you're a different sprite..."  
  
"Is it such a bad thing?"  
  
"No, I..." Dot bit her lip, unsure how to voice her feelings. "No... I just feel like I have to get to know you all over again. Bob, tell me what happened out there."  
  
He turned away from her, moving back to the balcony rail.   
  
"Dot, I can't. It's still too recent, even for me."  
  
"It's important, Bob. I want to understand."  
  
"No, Dot." Bob pushed away from the railing and turned back to face her. "It's not important. You know what's important?" He reached out and traced the side of her face gently with the back of his hand. "How much I love you. I'm still the same sprite. I just... grew up." He smiled wryly. "User knows you were always telling me to."  
  
Dot sniffed, wiping away a stray tear.   
  
"I'm sorry."  
  
Bob leaned closer to her, resting his forehead against hers.   
  
"Don't be sorry," he murmured. "You know... I think this is the first time we've ever been alone together."  
  
She smiled despite herself. "Probably. We're always in the middle of a crisis, or just heading out of one, or we're about to head into one..."  
  
He grinned; then heard the strains of the party music drifting up the dark corridor and out onto the balcony, accompanied by the laughter of dancing sprites, and the thumping of feet in rhythm.   
  
"Even here we're not really alone," Dot sighed, glancing down the hallway.   
  
"You... want to go somewhere else?"   
  
She looked back at him. He had a slightly mischievous look on his face. It was a look she hadn't seen in cycles. A part of the old Bob surfacing, if only for a split-nano. It was comforting.   
  
"Yes. I want to."  
  
Bob compiled his zipboard, stepped on, and held out a hand to Dot. She was about to step on, but hesitated.   
  
"What's wrong?"  
  
"Enzo..."   
  
Bob shook his head. "Enzo's in safe company, Dot. He'll be fine."   
  
Dot sighed. He was right. She needed to stop worrying so much. Take the time, Dot, she told herself. She took his hand, and stepped onto the zipboard, securing an arm around his waist.   
  
"So..." he said, "I guess the question now is - your place or mine?"  
  
  
  
"It's kind of surreal, being back in my apartment like this. I'm sure it wasn't this tidy, though."  
  
Bob scratched his head, a slightly bemused expression on his face as the two stood in the living room. Dot blushed slightly.   
  
"Bob... I have a little confession to make..."  
  
He raised an eyebrow at her, causing the colour to rise even more readily to her cheeks as she looked away in embarrassment.  
  
"I..." she started, then trailed off, biting her lip. *Oh, don't be so basic, Dot*, she told herself. *He won't laugh at you*. All the same, she couldn't meet his gaze, and retreated to the safety of the couch, folding herself into it. "I came here, a few seconds after you disappeared. I... don't know why. I was tired beyond tired, and Mouse told me to go get some downtime, or else..." she smiled, remembering the hacker's concern. "Anyway, I came here... and even with everything going on around us... it felt... safe. Like you were still here. And I kept coming back here, every night..."  
  
She closed her eyes briefly, then smiled tightly. "Silly, really."   
  
Bob shook his head. "No. I probably would have done the same."   
  
He eyed his antiquated music system - just like his car, it could be unreliable at the best of times. He couldn't stand the silence anymore. It reminded him too much of...   
  
*drifting, trapped, alone...*   
  
He shook the thought, and walked over to the equipment. After a nano or so of fiddling with the controls, he managed to find what he was looking for.   
  
A soft beat, a gentle rhythm.   
  
"May I have this dance?"  
  
Bob retraced his steps, and gently took Dot's hands in his, pulling her up off the couch and into his arms again before she could protest.  
  
"I never thought you could dance," she teased.   
  
He looked somewhat sheepish. "I can't... but I can do a pretty close approximation."  
  
She smiled, and took the initiative, leading them both in a simple, gentle movement around the room. No schedule, no war... no Games.   
  
This was *their* time.   
  
  
  
*It is time. Time for the Burning.  
  
And so they dragged him, half-conscious and bloody, from his cell. He had made it this far; had earned the respect of some of the Riders for his sheer stubborn endurance of their harsh ways. But there was more to come, and he knew, and he was afraid - afraid that he had no more left to give. That he would die out here, with nobody to know why, or when, or even care. Alone, among a people he didn't understand, and a language he couldn't comprehend...*  
  
  
"Bob? Bob!"  
  
It was a nano or two before he realised he was awake, sitting bolt upright in the bed. Dot had a hand on his shoulder, a concerned look evident on her face even in the relative darkness of the room. "Are you all right?"   
  
He slowed his rapid breathing, comforted by her presence. So many times he'd had this nightmare and had to wake up alone...   
  
Not tonight.   
  
"I... I'm fine. Sorry... I didn't mean to wake you."  
  
"It was about... them, wasn't it? The Riders."  
  
It was more a statement than a question.   
  
"Dot - "  
  
"I know what you're going to say, Bob. You said you weren't ready to talk about it. But I'm not stupid. I can guess what happened."  
  
He didn't answer, taking the moment to instead rub his sleep-ridden eyes. Dot scooted closer to him, resting her head on his shoulder. He put an arm around her.  
  
"I just need some time, is all. But... I'm glad you're here."   
  
He kissed the top of her head, and held her close. Not alone. Not tonight.  
  
* * *  
  
"Crash it! I'm late!"  
  
Bob squinted as he opened his eyes, adjusting to the light streaming into the bedroom. Dot had stolen one of the bed sheets, wrapping it around herself like a makeshift toga while she searched for her PID. He watched her for a nano, smiling, then reached out from the bed and gently tugged at a lower corner of Dot's sheet. She started, squeaking as the improvised covering slipped away.   
  
"Bob!"   
  
He laughed. She snatched at the sheet, then gave up and tried to look annoyed instead. She failed, a smile breaking out on her face at his mischievous expression.  
  
"I'm going to be late for my meeting! Stop that!"   
  
Bob smirked. "Dot Matrix, late? The system must be crashing!"   
  
She poked her tongue out at him, then spotted her PID on the floor.   
  
"Ah!"   
  
He sat up as she 'booted into her usual attire.   
  
"So you're loving me and leaving me, is that it?" he teased. She eyed him, allowing herself a last quick appreciation of his form, before leaning over and indulging him in a kiss.  
  
"'Fraid so. I have to meet with Phong and get some leftover files that didn't get sorted in the Archive after the restart properly reassigned."  
  
He grinned at her, then slid out of bed to draw her to him for a final kiss goodbye.   
  
"I'll be there in a few nanos," he said, as they parted. Dot squeezed his hand and shot him a parting smile as she left the apartment.  
  
"Now," Bob murmured to himself, gazing at the disheveled room, "where did I put my icon..."  
  
* * *  
  
  
Dot adjusted her glasses as she walked into the Principal Office, hoping silently that nobody would notice she was a couple micros late. The morning shift was already in, mugs of fresh java in hand as they went about their daily routine. I knew I forgot something, she mused, inhaling the scent of the hot beverage as a 0 binome wandered past. She sighed. It would have to wait for now, she told herself, and entered Phong's office.   
  
"Good morning, my child." The elderly sprite greeted her from his desk. Then he adjusted his glasses, and glanced at the chronometer. "You are late. It is... not like you. Are you well?"  
  
Dot could feel the heat rising to her cheeks, and tried to suppress it before Phong could notice.   
  
"I'm fine, Phong - I just overslept a little," she said dismissively, "the party really was something else last night." She smiled nervously.  
  
If he suspected anything, he didn't show it. He handed her several datapads.   
  
"We have downloaded all of the random files that were not indexed correctly in the restart. It may take some time to go through them."  
  
"No time like the present," she replied, and retreated with the datapads to her own office to begin the laborious task. But not before she'd gotten some java, she reminded herself...  
  
* * *  
  
  
Dot rubbed her eyes. The empty java mug seemed to be glaring accusingly at her from across the desk. *I can't have any more caffeine*, she thought. *I'll be up all night*. Suppressing a yawn, she moved on to the next datapad in the pile. She'd worked steadily through the mounds of what seemed to be mostly useless data, in an attempt to recatalogue and reupload them to the Archive. Assortments of random media files, Quicktime movie clips and some really arcane stuff on early Mainframe fashions numbered among them.   
  
*What's this one?* she thought to herself, looking at the file's all-too-brief summary. *A wav file? Better listen to it, I suppose... then I'm calling it a second...*  
  
It was crackling with static, and she had to strain to make out the words, much less who it was.   
  
She listened again.  
  
And again, not quite believing what she'd heard.  
  
And again.  
  
"No..."  
  
  
* * *  
  
Bob knocked softly as he opened the door to Dot's office.  
  
"Dot? Are you in here?"  
  
He peered in, and spotted her at her desk, the small lamp the only illumination in the room. She didn't acknowledge his entrance, her head buried in her hands.  
  
"Dot? It's late... I just came by to see how you were... doing...?"  
  
He trailed off, and frowned as he approached her desk, concerned. He reached over to her, to touch her, but she pulled away from him. Not even looking up, she spoke.   
  
"So how did you like your little 'experiment,' Bob? Was I a good test subject for you?" Her voice was tinged with bitterness.  
  
"What? Experiment?" Bob looked confused. "Dot - "  
  
"Oh, don't play innocent with me, Guardian," she spat, finally looking up, and meeting his puzzled gaze. She tossed the datapad across the desk towards him. "I found out about yours and Turbo's game... Mainframe, the 'great experiment'," she intoned sarcastically.   
  
Bob picked up the pad; played the file. Played it again. Slowly, realisation crept across his face. His gaze dropped, disbelief setting in. He sank into the chair opposite the Command.Com, shoulders slumped, setting the pad back on the desk.   
  
"It's true, isn't it?" she whispered, incredulous at his reaction, reading his silent admission of guilt. "It's all true!"  
  
"No!" His head snapped back up, his face defiant. "That's *not* what this was about!"   
  
"You could have gotten rid of Megabyte and Hexadecimal all along, and you chose not to for some stupid experiment!"  
  
"Dot, please..." He stood, a pained expression on his face. "You think I wanted all this to happen?"  
  
"What does it matter?" she yelled, reaching across the desk and picking up the datapad, then throwing it at him. He shielded himself from the missile with his arms, and it bounced harmlessly off him. "You let me believe that my father caused the explosion! I lost everything! I lost you, I lost Enzo... all for some stupid experiment." She sank back into her chair, sobbing.   
  
He closed his eyes. He knew she was right, and the truth hurt. Just like the dirty blade that had cut each and every scar onto his flesh.  
  
"I'm sorry, Dot. I... I was young, I didn't know any better... I was out to impress the Collective and - "  
  
"And that's supposed to make it all go away and be better?" she retorted, her violet eyes flashing dangerously. He met her gaze, pain and guilt etched on every part of his face.  
  
"You think that I don't think about it? How much I hurt everyone I love? I think about it every second, every cycle, Dot. I know it was my fault. I'm living with that knowledge, and it hurts me, more than you could ever know."  
  
There was silence for a few nanos.   
  
"Dot?"  
  
Her voice was quieter, more subdued this time.   
  
"I thought you loved me, Bob. Or was that an experiment, too?"  
  
"Dot, no! You're the one thing that kept me alive... I've loved you, always! The experiment was the viruses, not the people! I could no more fake my love for you than I could go against my code..."  
  
She took a shaky breath.   
  
"I'm sorry, Bob. I... I can't deal with this. Not right now."  
  
"But last night -"  
  
"I let my emotions take control. I was excited, and happy, and... I love you... but I can't forgive you, Bob. Not yet."  
  
She turned away from him, unable to meet his anguished expression.  
  
"Don't leave me, Dot... please...." he begged, feeling the knot of despair tighten in his stomach. He couldn't bear to spend this night alone, not now...  
  
"I'm sorry," she choked. "I can't do this."  
  
"I... "  
  
"Don't, Bob. Just go."  
  
* * *  
  
Bob left the Principal Office alone.   
  
Alone with his memories of the past, and berating himself for everything he had done - or rather, hadn't done. For the first time, after everything he'd been through, he wept; silent tears in a silent void of loneliness that threatened to engulf him...  
  
*And he was drifting, alone, through the Web, wondering if this was it, and the one image he kept seeing in his mind that made him want to believe he wasn't going to die, that he could make it home, even though there was no way he could survive, that his air supply must be running out soon... there was hope... wasn't there?*  
  
Wasn't there?  
  
  
  
* * * * * 


End file.
